So much of the world we live in today revolves around performance. Especially since the rise of social media, people now spend more time than ever before obsessing over how others perceive them, and trying to climb up the social ladder to success. Popularity, in the form of being an “influencer” is now a fully fledged career path, in fact a study conducted by market research company Morning Consult revealed that as much as 86 percent of people aged 13 to 38 would like to become a social media influencer. All this focus on social status poses a question for the sigma male – the rarest male personality type who is famed for living outside the bounds of the social dominance hierarchy. We’re going to explore just how to make it as a sigma male in a world that cares so much about what others think.

Learning to handle small talk

Small talk is notoriously the bane of the sigma male’s life. As these men naturally prefer to think deeply about things, having to maintain surface level conversation for the sake of keeping up appearances can be draining and seem like an utter waste of time. Learning to take small talk lightly, and developing the ability to have a quick chat when necessary can go great lengths in making a sigma male seem more approachable, and open him up to new friends and acquaintances that he might not otherwise make if he was to reject all forms of small talk.

Make friends based on interests

One important social strategy for sigma males is to make sure that they truly connect with the people they consider friends. Sigma males are not able to maintain fake and superficial friendships as easily as most other people can, as they simply don’t see the point and refuse to waste their time with such things. Making friends based on true passions and shared interests is the best way for the sigma male to cultivate a social circle that he finds truly supportive and energising.

Maintain a good physical regime

You’d be surprised how many people overlook this basic piece of life advice, despite the huge impact it has on day to day life. Living well means treating yourself well, and a good physical regime lies at the heart of this. Handling all kinds of social situations and interactions becomes a whole lot easier when you feel and look your best. A healthy diet, good personal hygiene, and a solid regimen of sleep and exercise puts the sigma male in the best possible position to handle the complicated lifestyle that he often finds himself juggling.

Don’t fake extroversion

As is often the case with those of an introverted nature, sigma males may face pressure from the rest of society to perform a sort of extroversion in order to fit in and be appreciated by their peers. It’s best not to conform to this social pressure, however, as forced extroversion tends to be a recipe for disaster. It’s important for sigma males to understand where their introversions and extroversions lie, and not to force a set of personality traits that will make both them, and ultimately the people around them too, uncomfortable.

Set boundaries

Everyone needs boundaries in life, and this is especially true of the sigma male. Heading into any new social environment – whether it be a new job, school, or a relationship – sigma males should make sure to politely but clearly lay down their personal boundaries to make sure that people know not to cross them. This might involve setting boundaries for your work life balance, or setting expectations for what others can expect from you in terms of commitment, but either way setting clear boundaries is key to maintaining the peaceful independence a sigma male strives for.

Make your personal space into a sanctuary

Like most introverted personality types, sigma males benefit massively from having a well maintained personal space that can act as a sort of sanctuary when they need to get away from the noise and bustle of the world. Sigma males should dedicate effort to the upkeep of a private space that is all of their own in order to restore peace of mind. One thing that unites all introverted personality types is that they need alone time in order to re-energise and maintaining a clean and peaceful personal sanctuary is the best way to achieve this.

It’s ok to say no

The social pressure to constantly be available is abundant in our current society. Now that the internet and portable devices sit in practically every person’s pocket, there is an ever increasing expectation to be at the constant beck and call of others, and sometimes it can feel like there’s no option to be uncontactable, even just for a few hours. Sigma males, as well as most of society, can benefit a great deal from learning that it’s ok to say no in order to protect your personal well-being. Recognising the limits of your availability, and taking some personal time to disconnect and go off the grid is key to maintaining a healthy mind in our era of hyperconnectivity.

Step out of your comfort zone

While it’s true that sigma males know themselves better than anyone, this doesn’t mean they’re right 100 percent of the time. Sometimes sigma males can benefit from a good shake up in their lives, through which they can discover new insights about themselves. As sigma males enjoy risk taking and are natural explorers, stepping outside their comfort zone from time to time is a survival tip that sigmas often relish.

Keep a diversity of company

As a lone wolf, it can sometimes feel easier to stick to yourself and a highly trusted inner circle when it comes to keeping up company. Sigma males sometimes need encouragement to step outside of the social box that they surround themselves with. Their natural curiosity means that they can often benefit greatly from meeting new and different types of people, and usually end up discovering sides of themselves they didn’t even know about.

Don’t feel pressured to lie about who you are

There is such a great social pressure to be a certain kind of person, or to fit neatly in to the ladder of the social dominance hierarchy, that many people end up feeling pressured to lie about who they truly are and how they truly feel. This is a toxic pressure that ends up causing more distress and feelings of disconnectedness and confusion than it is worth, and should be avoided at all costs. Sigma males in particular may see themselves subject to social pressure to conform, but staying true to yourself and refusing to lie about who you are is ultimately the healthiest way to live.

Find a position that really suits you

As sigma males possess a rare combination of confidence and introversion, it may seem unclear at first what type of role or profession they would be best off pursuing. Rather than try to force themselves in one direction or another, sigma males should remain dedicated to finding a role that they feel they can truly be themselves in – one that doesn’t force them to deny certain aspects of their personality. Even if this means switching from job to job for a while until you find an environment that allows you to be yourself, it’s probably better in the long run.

Strategically choose the large events you attend

Sigma males tend to avoid large social gatherings that might cause them to feel drained, bored, or even overwhelmed. However, avoiding these kinds of events won’t always be possible. It’s best to take a strategic approach to the events that you will and won’t attend. If there is a genuine benefit to be gained from a particular event, it may indeed be worth attending, but introverts should never cave in to the pressure to turn up to absolutely everything they are offered an invitation to.

Accept that not everybody will understand you

At the end of the day, all people are complicated – and this can be especially true of sigma males. It can be a difficult, but ultimately freeing lesson to that not everyone in life has to like or even understand you. As long as there are those you trust who appreciate you for who you are, it means fairly little what the rest think of you. A key tip to staying positive and self assured is remembering whose opinion actually matters at the end of the day.

Maintain control over your schedule

A simple, practical survival tip that works wonders for sigma males is to protect the amount of control they hold over their day to day schedules. Being naturally independent, sigma males struggle when they find themselves expected to show up at the beck and call of others. Freelance, remote, and part-time positions are a common method that the sigma male uses to remain as in control as possible over his own schedule.

Avoid crowds

Avoiding regular and unnecessary exposure to large crowds is advice that serves many introverted personality types well. Introverts are marked by the fact that extended social interaction becomes a draining experience for them, but this can be minimised by choosing to attend social events that don’t require a total bombardment of social interactions.

Focus on growth

One of the best pieces of live advice for a sigma male is to remain growth oriented in his approach to all things. All too often, people tend to slip into a fatalistic mentality where they see failure or challenge as permanent. Seeing both himself and his environment as part of a learning process helps to maintain a positivity and forward momentum that will inevitably help him succeed in life.

Appreciate yourself

The number one piece of survival advice for every sigma male is to remember to appreciate himself. While he may not fit in to society the way it wants, he has a rare and natural set of traits that set him apart and allow him to succeed in his own way. Keeping a positive mindset towards the unique mind and lifestyle of being a sigma male is the best way to ensure you treat yourself with respect and are able to get the most out of life as a sigma male.