A Sigma has character traits that make him good at conflict resolution. While he’s an honest man who speaks in a straight-forward way, he also has a calm attitude that allows him to resolve conflict without causing drama. Many people have no idea how to deescalate tense situations. As a result, when they get into disagreements, they often make the problems worse. Conflict resolution is a major social skill that can benefit every aspect of your life. So, here we look at 8 ways that Sigmas can be blunt without hurting feelings.
8
Sigmas never compete for social status
Among men, Alphas and Gammas crave social status. As a result, they tend to cause a lot of conflict because wherever they go, they compete for higher positions. They often resort to dirty tactics that bring other people down. The Alpha male bulldozes anybody who he perceives as a threat; whereas the Gamma resorts to passive aggressive behavior. In both cases, a strong desire for social status motivates their actions.
Of course, Sigmas don’t care about social approval, so they never compete for status. While Sigmas are competitive, they’re competing for a different prize. Namely, the Sigma’s goal is to live a meaningful life.
To illustrate this concept, compare two musicians: one being an Alpha male and the other a Sigma. The Alpha makes music because he wants to be famous and leave behind a musical legacy. He wants the world to remember his name in 200 years time. These are typical Alpha motivations. In contrast, the Sigma musician doesn’t care about fame or legacy. Instead, he has an obsession with his artform and wants to attain mastery for its own sake. It’s an internal goal that he finds meaningful.
Sigmas can be blunt without hurting people’s feelings because they’ll never bring social status into a disagreement. If a Sigma confronts you, he is addressing a real problem that he’s trying to solve. He never turns a small issue into a battle for status.
7
Sigmas have a balanced approach to conflict
Everybody has to deal with low-level conflict, so academics have studied conflict resolution because it applies to subjects like business, politics, and education. They’ve identified two main approaches to conflict: People either avoid confrontations or else they seek them out.
People who avoid conflict fear the repercussions. They don’t want to create a problem that spirals out of control. Among men, they’re often called “nice guys” because they try to never hurt anybody’s feelings. Unfortunately, their personalities can come off as ingratiating.
In contrast, the people who seek out conflict prefer to deal with problems head on. In the male hierarchy, Alphas actually enjoy conflict because they’re good at it, and they normally win. They don’t care about hurting feelings, and they won’t hesitate to enter a dispute — especially if it helps them gain status.
Sigmas strike a good balance between these two approaches. On the one hand, a Sigma avoids conflict because he dislikes drama and prefers to avoid the negative consequences that come from fighting. But on the other hand, if he judges that confrontation is unavoidable, he will enter conflict without fear. In other words, a Sigma is flexible and will tailor his approach to each specific situation.
6
Sigmas are good judges of character
A lot of conflict arises from misunderstanding other people and their intentions. A good judge of character is somebody who observes the people in his daily life and picks up on subtle cues. He is sensitive to non-verbal communication, noticing things like tone of voice and body language. These observations help him to understand his environment.
Being a good judge of character applies to low-level conflict because, if you understand the people you’re dealing with, you can anticipate their reactions and predict their behaviors. For example, if you spot somebody with typical Alpha male traits, it won’t surprise you if he tries to be the leader. And if you have to work with a Gamma, his passive aggressive remarks won’t come as a shock. It’s important to be a good judge of character because it helps you navigate the social world.
Sigmas are good judges of character because they watch people closely, and they can adapt their approach to conflict depending on the situation.
5
Sigmas choose a rational approach
During conflict, people often escalate problems and turn them into something bigger. They lose focus and forget the real issue because their emotions overwhelm them. When this happens, many people act impulsively; they say and do things that they later regret — all because they lose focus and let emotions cloud their judgment.
Sigmas choose the rational approach to conflict; therefore, Sigmas make sure that they stick to the facts. You cannot solve a problem if you don’t understand it, so grasping the facts is the first step to reaching a peaceful resolution. As a consequence, this rational approach makes the Sigma a good listener because he wants to hear everyone’s interpretation of the facts. And to make sure that his arguments are solid, a Sigma will think through possible objections to his own position.
It all boils down to focussing on the real issues. Sigmas are good at conflict because they keep bringing people back to the facts of the situation. A Sigma won’t let his opponent side step the real issue or change the topic. And as a result, a Sigma creates less drama because he bases his position on the facts.
4
Sigmas remain calm and relaxed under pressure
When it comes to conflict resolution, one emotion deserves special attention: the emotion of anger. A smart approach to anger management will help you deal with conflict. And while there are many types of anger, the two types that cause the most trouble are rage and passive aggressive behavior. Sigmas avoid both types.
The rager is somebody who blows up into explosive fits of anger; often Alpha males face this temptation. For whatever reason, some men overreact habitually, and anger becomes one of their personality traits. They develop the reputation for being short-tempered. And sometimes, when having a fit, ragers will resort to violence and intimidation.
A passive aggressive man, on the other hand, is usually a Gamma male. He experiences a seething rage that manifests as snarky, underhanded behavior. Gammas avoid violent conflict at all costs. Instead, they prefer to sabotage from the shadows. Gammas gossip and talk behind your back. Their passive aggressive behavior can make them difficult to work with.
A Sigma has two approaches to anger: Either he remains calm because he doesn’t care about the situation, or else he gets slightly annoyed. But in both cases, he avoids extreme reactions. So, you will never see a Sigma having a temper tantrum, and you will never hear him making passive aggressive remarks. His control over anger makes him much less prone to drama.
3
Sigmas are fair-minded
When a Sigma enters conflict, he wants to find a peaceful resolution. But not everybody has such good intentions. When some people enter conflict, they have malicious goals in mind because they want to hurt somebody or get revenge. A Sigma’s goal is to find a win/win resolution that makes everybody happy. Of course, it’s not always possible to make everybody happy. Nevertheless, a Sigma will take your interests into account, and he will try to find a fair resolution.
It comes back to the question of rationality. When you engage in interpersonal conflict, you should be able to justify your actions. In a court of law, judges want to hear rational explanations for your behavior. Similarly, when Sigmas try to resolve a conflict, they look for reasonable solutions, using a fair-minded approach. Even if you don’t agree with a Sigma’s solution, you will at least understand the logic behind it.
As a result, Sigmas make good leaders — even though they dislike the job. Sigmas are fair, not because they’re moral saints, but because they use logic to resolve conflict, and often rational solutions are also fair-minded. Plus, this approach reduces drama because people don’t feel screwed over. A Sigma can explain his decisions clearly, so people are more willing to comply.
2
Sigmas are good at letting go of the past
Another reason why Sigmas can be straight-forward without causing drama is their ability to let go of the past. During a conflict, some people take the situation personally, and they form resentments that can last for years. Sigmas, on the other hand, live in the present moment; it’s part of their mentality. Sigmas think about the past only when they want to learn a lesson or fix a mistake. Other than that, Sigmas never ruminate about negative events. So if, in the past, you had a disagreement with a Sigma, chances are that he has already forgotten about it and will never think about the situation again. He never replays the event in his mind, and he doesn’t hold a grudge against you.
This ability to let go reduces drama because it allows people to focus on the future. In the workplace, for example, Sigmas can move on from an issue as if nothing happened. And sometimes conflict even helps to address underlying problems and improve working conditions. Thanks to their ability to let go, Sigmas also make good employers and managers.
1
Sigmas choose their words carefully
During conflict, the words you use will determine the outcome of the situation. And while Sigmas always think before they speak, during conflict, they pay special attention to their words.
There are many reasons to think before speaking. Firstly, a brief pause for reflection allows you to clarify your thoughts before vocalizing them. By doing this, you avoid blurting out the wrong words at inappropriate times. Secondly, when you choose your words carefully, people understand you better, and you avoid miscommunication. Finally, thinking before you speak helps to bring your focus back to the facts of the situation. And as we’ve already seen, focusing on the facts helps to calm down emotional people and reduce drama.
Therefore, Sigmas take a second to think before they speak, and they try to use words with precision.
Hopefully, this article explained the Sigma’s direct but calm approach to conflict. The ability to navigate the social world increases your chances of success, so the calm Sigma approach to conflict is a competitive advantage.
