Are you scared to try new things? Do you feel nervous speaking in public or starting a conversation with someone new? If so, then you’ll be pleased to know that self-confidence can be developed, and in today’s video, we’re going to share our top 10 tips for doing just that.

Self-confidence is the attitude we have about our skills, strengths, and abilities – if you have self-confidence, you trust in yourself and view yourself in a positive way. You’re also able to handle criticism, set clear boundaries, and be able to effectively communicate your realistic expectations and goals.

Having self-confidence means you will be open to more opportunities and experiences in life, and gain more skills. A lack of self-confidence might make you find it hard to believe in your own success, which ultimately leads to failure.

Fortunately, there are many ways to increase your self-confidence!

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Our first piece of advice for overcoming a lack of self-confidence is to stop comparing yourself to others!

Whether you’re comparing your life to those of your Facebook friends, or your earnings to the income of your best friend, these comparisons are all detrimental to your self-esteem. A recent study has shown that there is a direct link between envy and how you feel in your own skin. Researchers have found that the more you compare yourself to others, the more envious you become, which makes you feel progressively worse.

So, be aware of comparing your wealth, abilities, achievements, or other qualities to those of others. If you tend to think about how other people are much better or have much more than you, this will always ruin your self-confidence. If you find yourself thinking like this, consciously stop for a moment and focus instead on what you have achieved or want to achieve in future. Don’t think of others to compare their results with your own, but to study them, and by doing so, you can draw on their knowledge to develop your own skills and abilities, which will lead you closer to achieving the things you want in life.

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Our second piece of advice is to exercise!

A lot of people work-out to look good for the summer, by losing weight or trying to gain muscle. Not only is exercise great for these reasons, but it also has the added benefit of greatly increasing your self-confidence. It’s been known for a long time that exercise can greatly improve people’s mood and general well-being, as well as help them overcome depression and anxiety. However, to reap these benefits and increase your self-confidence, you need to work-out consistently, not only occasionally, but for an extended period of time.

And, not only does your self-esteem increase because you look and feel better, but also because long-term training requires commitment and dedication, which in itself is a perfect example of success!  Furthermore, this experience of success will help you realize that if you really want something, you can achieve it. Remember, success is not dependent on the judgement of others, but on your own self-belief.

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Our next piece of advice is not only for boosting your self-confidence, but also for continuous self-improvement. Step out of your comfort zone!

We understand that for most people, stepping out of your comfort zone is uncomfortable. However, to gain confidence, you need to try to feel at ease in as many situations as possible. By doing things that are unfamiliar or challenging to you every day, even in the smallest of ways, they will eventually become routine, and as a result you will feel more comfortable doing them in daily life.

You’ll not only get used to new situations this way, but you’ll also learn over time that you don’t have to be afraid of new challenges. This should be done gradually, so that the change becomes permanent. So, you don’t have to look for a new job right away or test yourself as a speaker at the biggest conference you can find. Start small. For example, start talking to people you normally wouldn’t, pick up a new hobby that’s a bit different from what you’re used to, and take the rest step-by-step.

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The fourth tip to increase your self-confidence immediately is to pay attention to your appearance.

Wearing nice clothes and being well-groomed will not only result in positive attention from others, but more importantly, it will positively influence the way you look at yourself and how you feel in your own skin. Which is great – but wait, there’s more. Wearing beautiful clothes not only improves your self-esteem but by doing so can also change the way in which you think and behave. In a related experiment, researchers found that test subjects who dressed as doctors in a white coat also began to behave and think as doctors, for example by paying more attention to certain things. So, if you want to be confident, imagine how your confident self would dress and start wearing these clothes. This is a very simple way to increase confidence and has an almost immediate effect.

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Our next piece of advice is also somewhat related to the previous one. Pay attention to your posture!

How you hold yourself affects your self-esteem and thought processes in the same way as your attire does. And we didn’t just pull this advice out of thin air! Plenty of studies have shown that proper posture can greatly increase self-confidence. For example, in one experiment students were given math tests and asked to sit up straight in one test, and hunch over in another. The tests that were taken with the students sitting up straight resulted in higher levels of confidence and the ability to think clearly, whereas when slouched, their thinking ability was reduced, and reported as inhibited.

Proper posture also gives you an advantage in everyday situations. When you slouch, you take on a defensive pose, to which your brain often responds by evoking negative feelings thus influencing you to think in a similar way. As the researchers found, the way you treat yourself affects not only how others regard you, but also how you perceive yourself.

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The next piece of advice is to keep learning!

If you are prepared and know what to expect in any situation and how and why things happen, it will result in you facing far fewer uncomfortable situations. Of course, when we’re learning something new, we naturally feel insecure. In such cases, however, relying on your experience and recalling that the more you learn and the more skilled you become, the more that feeling of insecurity goes away.

When you master something well enough, it lays the groundwork for you to be able to believe in yourself. Of course, there is also the idea that more knowledge results in more insecurity, because smart people don’t always see what knowledge they currently have, but instead, only see how far they are from having all the knowledge. But if you act on our advice, you will be able to overcome this perspective and be able to use the knowledge you have gained to your advantage.

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Our seventh piece of advice is one of the most important –  always think positive!

If you actually believe you can achieve something, you are more likely to succeed. Whereas, if you immediately begin questioning your own abilities then you’ll likely fail at the starting line –  you will end up either not even bothering to try, or if you do, you may give up prematurely.

About positive thinking and how it affects your life A lot of books, articles and films have been made on the concept of positive thinking and how it affects your life. There is a lot to learn on this topic but as a summary: The basis of positive thinking is to always highlight what you are good at and successful in, to learn from your mistakes, and always have faith that you can achieve your goals. To help, here are some practical tips on how you can master this:

Get to know your strengths and weaknesses: Write a list of things you’re good at and also things you need to improve on. Discuss this list with your family or friends, and in addition to giving advice, they can help you add more to the list. Once you have that, you can deal with these strengths and weaknesses much more consciously.

Know that everyone makes mistakes: Do not see your mistakes as a failure, but as an opportunity from which you can learn. Reflect on what you messed up and look for ways to avoid making the same mistake again.

Accept compliments and praise yourself: If you get a compliment from someone, thank them and ask them why they have that perspective. This will help you recognize the things you are good at and make it much easier for you to focus on them. If no one is currently praising you, but you feel you deserve recognition, then you should praise yourself. Even out loud.

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Our next piece of advice is to surround yourself with positive people!

Try to spend as much time as possible amongst those who are motivating you either because you look up to them or because they support you. If you are in the company of such people, it will be much easier for you to realize what your strengths are, and you will learn much faster how to focus on them instead of your weaknesses. Seek out the company of people who will honestly, yet constructively tell you their opinions about you and get rid of those energy vampires around you who drain you of positive energy. How exactly do you recognize these toxic people? You’re in luck because we made a video about it, you can find the link in the description below!

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Our ninth piece of advice is to set goals for yourself!

You don’t have to set big goals to be Superman right away, you have to start small. Decide what your ultimate goals and ambitions are and what steps you need to take to accomplish them. Once you know what they are, break them down as much as you can into small items, and strive to consistently complete them in order. This will give you a continuous experience of success and after a while you will realize that you are able to achieve what you previously thought was impossible. At the same time, your self-confidence will grow stronger and, as a bonus, you’ll also achieve a goal that you didn’t have the courage to achieve before.

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Our tenth and final advice today is not to be arrogant!

Many people confuse true self-confidence with arrogance, and it’s true that it’s easy to become arrogant on the road to gaining self-confidence. Arrogant people tend to be insecure within themselves and behave arrogantly to gain the external reinforcement that makes them feel good. The person seeking self-confidence is equally insecure, but it must be noted that the acquisition of self-confidence does not primarily come from external reinforcements, but from the individual’s own self-satisfaction. Therefore, be careful not to try to build self-confidence from external and self-imposed accolades, but instead by focusing on yourself, and according to your own values.